Self-Worth: Let's Define It

Lynette Thiriot
Apr 2, 2015
4 min read

Dear Body Buds,

What is Self-Worth?

Is that loving yourself, putting yourself above anyone and everyone else? Is that being self-serving and selfish? Is it pedicures, long bubble baths, and lavish shopping sprees with no regard for those around us?

Or is that what the world would have you think?

(Because, heaven forbid, we actually love OURSELVES, right?)

Self-Worth comes from a source on the inside of us. We create it through faith, by acting on the singular belief that we matter. It is the foundation of our ability to believe in ourselves. So why is that important?

I spent a lot of years believing that once I got to my "goal weight," or looked like a competitor or so-and-so on social media, that I would be happy. I thought I would then love myself. I thought I would then appreciate my body, because it would be perfect and I could buy any clothes that I wanted because they would fit and look great!

Ha ha! Yes, I'm laughing at myself! How self-righteous of me!

When I really stop and analyze those statements, I realize just how selfish I was being. I started down many paths to get me to those "goals." None of them took me where I wanted to go because I didn't even really know where I wanted to end up.

Was it so other people would want to look like me? Was it so my husband would think I was the sexiest woman alive (which he already assured me I was and sincerely feels that way)?

No. It was my own self-doubt and insecurities.

Over the past year I finally found my journey that would take me where I really wanted to go. I set goals that were realistic and that were sometimes too big for me to even imagine. I got to my goal; I finally had a body that I didn't think I could ever achieve. But so what? What I really gained was far more important than that! I gained a deep-abiding love for myself. What I was capable of achieving and overcoming. I learned to appreciate my body in every single stage. The stage of post-baby when everything was fluffy and hung over my pants, because my amazing body had conceived, grown, and given life to five beautiful little boys. I learned to love my body and my mind as it struggled to trust what I was doing, to retrain my triggers and self-doubt.

I learned to love how my body would respond to different foods and different ways of exercise. I was amazed at how I came to truly know the good, the bad, the ugly, and myself.

THAT is Self-Worth.

I learned to look inside and become who I am meant to be and stop comparing myself with everyone around me. Compairson truly is the thief of joy. Sure, it's great to be inspired by others. I have countless examples that "inspire" me, but they don't make me feel less of a beautiful woman--they lift me up!

I have made a short, not all-inclusive list of what I have come to identify as self-worth. I hope a few of these points will resonate with you too:

1. It's okay to choose ourselves sometimes. Yes, it is! Go get that pedicure, fit a workout into your busy schedule, and say 'no' to someone who constantly expects more out of you than is fair. Spend some time on what makes you YOU, and makes you happy. It is important to know who you are and what makes you happy if you are going to love yourself.

2. Build a life that YOU love. You cannot wait around for someone else to make you happy. Whether married, single, divorced, or in any relationship, you are the only one who can make you happy. The great part is that happiness radiates to everyone around you and makes their lives better too.

3. Give your body the nurturing rest, nutrition, exercise, and comfort it needs. We have to take care of our physical bodies. Nobody feels happy when they are run down, low on energy, or uncomfortable in their own skin. There is a beautiful balance between physical and emotional happiness.

4. Accept ALL of yourself: the good parts, the not-so-pretty parts, and the downright ugly parts. By accepting those parts, you can begin to make positive changes. Denial gets us nowhere!

5. Own your inner and outer beauty. Compliment yourself without feeling arrogant or guilty, and accept the compliments of others.

6. Allow yourself to dream big without limitations or judgements.

7. Do not label yourself with other's opinions. Be courageous enought to take a look inside and see if there is any truth to what they are saying. Discard what isn't, and work to change what is.

8. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Instead of beating yourself up over them, choose to appreciate the opportunity to learn and grow.

Self-Worth is not a destination, it's a practice. It is a beautiful, worthwhile journey. While you are on your path to health and fitness, remember why you are doing what you are doing. Without the 'why,' it doesn't really matter. As exciting as it is to be "skinny" or "fit," it is far more important to love yourself EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.

Love your bud,